Wednesday, January 2, 2013

New Year, New Word

+ condition or character as to who a person or what a thing is
+ the sense of self, providing sameness and continuity in personality over time

Who am I?

Last year my word was love.
I don't know that I learned as much as I was hoping when it comes to love. I definitely learned some things. That love is not easy. That love is not just love on its own. It is also patience, kindness, gentleness, truth, courage. It encompasses much and requires much and is worth it every time.

Throughout the year, I often fell short of my own expectations to love others. And there would be times that I labeled myself as an unloving person.  I would get discouraged and feel like I should be a better person. And throughout the year, I heard over and over that I should find my identity in God and not what I do or who I want to be.

Find your identity in God.

Sounds good.
But how?

Well, I have no idea. That's why identity is my word for 2013. Because it's a journey. One that I have waited too long to embark on.

I know that it starts with soaking up more of Him. In order to learn more about the creation, you should get to know the Creator, right?

I've realized lately that I don't always know who I am. Sometimes I wonder about my feelings and where they came from and how I came to feel them. Sometimes, someone will ask me how I feel about something, and my only response is "I don't know." I don't know who I am. I don't know what I feel or why I feel it. I get nervous when I realize that I believe differently than the people I love. But that's silly because no two people will every feel the exact same way about every topic.

So I'm taking this year to figure it out. Who am I? Who does God say I am? How can I keep that in the forefront of my mind when worry, doubt, and uncertainty all seem to creep in? How do I find my identity in Him?

I'm not sure yet, but I'm excited to see how He shapes me and forms me in new ways this year. I know He is faithful and that if I'm seeking wisdom with a heart that longs to know Him more, He will provide. Here's to discovering new things this year. 

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