Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Baby Steps

I always have insanely high expectations for myself beyond midnight.
I listen to music that makes me feel good (Sia - We Are Born), I read some inspiring blogs that make me want to save the world and be a better person (my favorite right now - "life lessons"), I browse around tumblr until I find a million things that make me want to be creative, and all of a sudden I think tomorrow is going to be the best, most creative, most productive day of my life.

I'm usually disappointed.

As with most things in life, baby-steps are key. So for tomorrow:
-coffee. Lauren challenged me to go a week and have a cup of coffee first thing in the morning to get myself started and productive. It literally lasted a week, but I need to get back to it because it was actually helpful. So tomorrow I will have my coffee.
-I've snagged an extra short shift at work tomorrow, which I'm looking forward to. It's short enough not to take away from my day, but it's enough to get more hours. Win.
-going to the shop (read: Christian Family Automotive. It will almost always be known as "the shop") and finishing up all thank-you cards for customers in March. This is about the only helpful thing I've been doing lately at the shop so I need to stick with it.
-small group! I love the married couples small group we're a part of. I learn something new about marriage and/or parenting every week.

So those are the necessary things happening tomorrow. Also on the agenda is to write one page of something in my notebook, whether it's a prayer or a thankful list.

I can do it.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Change is Coming!

Ok, it's time to get serious (but not really, kind of). The blog is getting a mini-makeover. The past couple months have been about starting something and sticking with it. So far, so good. I can do this. I can document my new marriage and learn things along the way and eventually discover more about myself. And in the future it will all be here, in one place! That's the goal anyway.

My lovely friend Lauren is going to help me come up with something a bit more fitting for me in terms of design! It's going to be great.

I'm not sure where this blog is going to go or how it's going to change in the coming months, but I'm excited to keep up with it and see what it could become :]

Awkward and Awesome!

Awkward:
-the fact that I can tell that some weeks my only posts are going to be on Thursday for this very special occasion
-big wigs who never show up when they say they will. Supposedly our dear Mr. Chang (found and CEO of F21) is in town and scheduled to visit our lovely store. I got all dolled up today and followed every rule, hoping to meet him or at least catch a glimpse. But alas, he skipped out.
-this didn't happen today, but yesterday the wind threw a fit...and my skirt up. If anyone was around they saw eeeeverything. super awkward.
-my hair today resembles a lion's mane. Sometimes awesome, mostly awkard.
-not ever having pictures on the blog. woops.

Awesome:
-I got a compliment from almost every person I work with today about my outfit. It's just a red maxi dress but apparently it works on me :)
-work today in general was awesome. When the bosses are in a good mood, you know it'll be a good day.
-getting off at a decent hour so I can go to small group!! I love our married couples small group so much, and I've only been twice. Our leaders are amazing examples of great parents, and I know we have a ton to learn from them.
-husband getting to take a little cat nap. I feel so bad for him because he's tired all the time. Gotta take rest where you can get it!

Friday, March 18, 2011

learning from the good and bad

One thing that I am so thankful for in our new marriage is how many couples we find ourselves spending time with. Couple who have been together even less time than we have and couples that have been married for years.

Honestly, there is abundance of love around us.

I feel like Robert and I do a good job of seeing other couples and picking out the qualities we see in them that we would like to possess. We see couples who speak to each other respectfully, couples who love deeply even in everyday moments, couples who laugh together like children. We've seen so many beautiful marriages and relationships, and we always walk away saying, "man, I want our marriage to still look like that 10 years down the road."

We also see couples in turmoil and pain. Kids that probably weren't ready to handle the commitment of marriage and jumped the gun. Two people that live together and share their lives but are constantly on edge and agitated. That is the saddest thing to me, and we always walk away talking about how to avoid hating each other 10 years from now.

In every life, there is good and there is bad.
I am thankful to have a husband who is so unimaginably good at seeing the good in life. He is a joyful person. And he is teaching me to be the same. I am thankful when I am reminded that we are at peace with each other. We are not in turmoil or pain in each others' presence. We are at peace and in love. And even though it tears into my heart to see two people who are committed but dreadfully unhappy, I am thankful to have so many examples around us that we can learn from.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Awkward & Awesome Thursday

Hooray!
One of my favorite blogs that I follow is the Daybook. I think Sydney is gorgeous and funny and for some reason with the way she types I always think she's british. She is not. That is my brain haha

Every Thursday, Sydney does a little installment of awesome-ness and awkward-ness. So since I have nothing else to write about (everything is the same), I figured I'd fill up space with this!

Awkward:
-trying to watch videos that may or may not be labeled inappropriate while at our shop (read: my husband's professional, serious place of work). I mean, come on, Lady Gaga, are you really birthing things in your videos now? Kesha, are you really fighting James van der Beek and dining with unicorns? Can I just watch a normal video without having my hand hover over the "minimize" button?
-studying Katy Perry videos for an upcoming audition and realizing that her live performances don't give me much to go on. Can you do more than stand and clap, please?

Awesome:
-Herr's Prime Steak flavored potato chips. yes. delicious.
-the most amazing, feel-good music. you should listen to the Civil Wars.
-having the house to myself last night for the first time since we got married. I watched copious amounts of Jersey Shore.
-spring weather! tomorrow's high is 79 and saturday's is 80!!

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Is It Right To Be Angry?

Yes, I'm still chugging along through b90x! I'm a day or so behind, but I'm almost done with the Old Testament and on to the home stretch of the New!

Honestly, reading through all of the Old Testament at once is a daunting task. The Israelites were awful and repetitive and just hard to follow. The worst part is that we're exactly like them now. We don't see idols as golden calves or wooden monuments, but we have them. We turn from the Lord daily, so it's hard for me to face it as I read a thousand straight pages about it.

Anyway,

I just finished Jonah, which is another great example of a story that stings because it is such an accurate representation of my own shortcomings. Jonah runs from God, spends some days in the fish's belly and says one sentence that somehow turns 120,000 people back to God (I can't help get the feeling that either the author left a lot of critical details out or that pieces of this story were lost along the line). Once they decide to repent, Jonah is pissed. So mad. He even asks for God to kill him! He'd rather die than have his enemies receive forgiveness and happiness. I received a little tap on my shoulder (or slap in the face, you know, whatever) when I read, "The Lord replied, 'Is it right for you to be angry about this?'"

Yikes.
Probably not, Lord. It's probably not right for me to get angry when someone else gets something good, even if it's what I wanted. It's not right for me to yell and fume whenever something doesn't go according to my timing or plan. It's not right for me to be angry at Your decisions and Your will just because it is not easy in my eyes.

I have issues with anger and negativity. The speed at which anger can build up within me astounds me and steals my breath. Over minute, ridiculous things. But at this point in life I know that I feel things deeply and it's just something that I am learning to control. But I hope that Jonah's disobedience and his story will remind me to be calm, to hear the Lord and to try and see what His will is and why He moves the way He does.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

ha! This is a hilarious and inaccurate representation of my Sunday. Caption: MackBull claims its first victims.

Oh Sunday.. I love you.

Today was hilarious. I'm so blessed to serve with hilarious men and women who also happen to love the Lord. Phenomenal combination. Today I learned about MackBull side effects, cursing stage hands, and the crazy things interns at church do. Overall, it was awesome.

Sorry, that picture is so awful.

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Love!

This week in Charlotte is Love Week. It's an amazing week of serving our city with the many churches in our community. There are 26 churches in all, and our goal was to serve 25,000 hours altogether in one week. So far we're at 22,039 and we have one whole day  left. It's pretty crazy to see what can happen when the Church comes together to serve the ones who really need it.

This week, Robert and I volunteered with our small group at Samaritan's Feet. We organized a bunch of shoes and got them ready to ship out to various countries around the world. It's crazy, they told us that through Love Week, our volunteers did about 3 months of work for them! They rely heavily on volunteers, so it's awesome to know that in one week so many people did so much. Robert and I had a great time helping out. But I felt so puny when I found out that one of the teenage guys in our church committed throughout the week to volunteering 50 HOURS. On his own. dang. So he took the week off of his job and just straight up volunteered all week long, and he's planning on going on a mission trip with Samaritan's Feet later this year to do a shoe distribution. That's crazy dedication for a teenager. But honestly, it's not uncommon around here. There are so many amazing kids that go to our church, it's unreal. I don't think I realized how many dedicated and sold out kids there were in the world. I love it that there are kids so much younger than me teaching me so much about being like Christ.